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Archive for: trauma

Permission to Have Dating Anxiety GRANTED...

Dear Brooke, I'm a senior in college, and I have yet to date anyone at university. Since a bad [read: traumatizing] experience with a now-ex boyfriend in high school, I have yet to take steps towards pursuing anyone.

I've always been a fairly soft-spoken person, but in high school, I used to be really outgoing when it came to pursuing a love interest. Recently, I just came out as bisexual, and I'm constantly overwhelmed by the number of single, sexy and smart men and women at my university. (YAY!) I just can't find it within myself to take the first step: asking a guy or girl out for coffee/dinner/a date/sex seems is incredibly daunting for me.

Does this make me weird? How would you suggest I build up my self-confidence when it comes to dating? Thank you! I love the site :) 

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The Thing About Dating People Who Reject You...

Hi Brooke, So I'm actually writing on behalf of my friend. My observation of my friend is that she has the cat/mouse complex, I call it. She could care less about guys who are into her, and guys that reject her are taken very deeply and personally and thus pursued in a sexual relationship. Of course, with no way that it develops into something deeper or committal, which is what she deeply deeeeply inside wants, or so she says.

She has all the awareness in the world but hasn’t made the steps to work towards her security. Par Example, She met this dude they dated, he dumped her for some chick who lives in your neck of the woods (We're on the east!) She has pursued a sexual relationship with him with some emotional connection but she knows this relationship ain't goin no where.

She definitely is an ALPHA female, (works in corporate, has some masculine energy, talks about sex all the time and is very opinionated). So knowing her personality type, does this mean she just attracts men that are confused, misleading, passive, and in outer space?

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The thing about trauma...

Check out the latest "Cheeky Dear Abby" article on Cheeky Chicago...


Dear Brooke,

I have significantly moved on from a very traumatic ending to a 7 year relationship and short-lived marriage. It all ended in 2007. I have since remarried and am 5 months pregnant.

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